The Challenge: Answer a specific question you have by creating a self-portrait using photograph of yourself as a child.
|"Remember the Magic"|
My Question: How do I deal with this feeling of listlessness, this bored feeling of being stuck?
I suppose this is a problem that a lot of working-from-home moms have. Sometimes, even when I have stacks of work to do, that ole listless feeling of boredom creeps in.
But as I gathered images to create this portrait of my younger self, I felt a gentle tapping into that inner child that I once was. The process of creating this image urged me to this question: Why was I never bored, listless, 'stuck in a rut' as my childhood self?
And as I continued to work at recapturing the essence of my younger self, the answer slowly emerged: because as a child, I believed in magic...I relished in my imaginative tendencies. Back then my creativity led me to grand ideas, wonderful places, exotic trips....all from the floor of my bedroom.
I remember a dollhouse I received as a gift in the fifth grade. It became an evening ritual for me. My sister would take reign of the remote control and zone out in front of the TV to shows like The Brady Bunch while I created and recreated worlds, stories, grand scenes with my dollhouse. Sometimes dolls inhabited them, other times families of animals ran the household. But for me, that time was magical. Still, to this day, I hold a dear fondness for dollhouses. I think they are probably one of the most magical toys you can give a child (next to a pack of crayons and some blank paper). That's why all the heavy technological emphasis on toys now days just makes me sad...so many kids are losing their magic before they even find it.
I firmly believe that in order to find happiness as an adult, I need to allow my inner child the liberty to roam free sometimes. I suppose this happens quite often in my artwork and my poetry. Yet somehow these activities always seem to have such a serious structure: they must be perfect, they must be outstanding. My younger self didn't bother with perfections, she just lost herself joyfully in the act of imagining and creating. I want to do be able to do that again!